Friday, February 25, 2005

TGI Friday Five!

Take a look around, you're probably at work and have loads of assorted crap strewn across your desk and floor...ok, maybe that's just me. I'm pretty sick of looking at it every day and thinking about how I should clean it up so everyone who walks by my office stops giving me that little raised-eyebrow glance, thinking. "Uh huuuh, I see she still has those newspapers thrown all over the floor. Is she secretly housbreaking a puppy in there?" Well fuck that. Let's all dig deeper into that pile of crap on our desks, shall we? And if you're all cozy at home in your pjs or having some nice coffee in a wireless hotspot and not chained to your desk, don't even reply because I'm mad at you and we're not speaking.

Answer these five for me today. Please!

Who knows the evils that lurk in the heart of your cube/office/desk?
1. Pick up the closest piece of paper. What does the third line down say? "get new menu from banquet center" Mine was a to-do list. I'm trying to plan a menu for an event my office is having in a few months, and the woman at the center is such a jackass; she's even more inept at her job than I am at mine, and that's making me look bad. All I need her to do is send me a damn menu. I've been calling her for three weeks about this, and she just can't seem to master e-mail or a fax machine.

2. How many writing utensils do you have within arm's reach? I have a big mug full of pens, pencils, markers. Let's see...16

3. Do you have a photo on your desk? What is the subject?I have a picture of Mike in front of CBGB's. It's a swell picture, but sometimes I look at it and think about how he kind of looks like Dave Eggers in it, and that kind of annoys me.

4. What about books? Any of those?I have some saucy, provocative stuff here....The AP Stylebook and Libel Manual, the Yellow Pages, the 2005 Indiana Electric Cooperative Directory, Webster's Dictionary. Yeah, don't cross me, or I might have to, uh....look stuff up on yo' sorry ass.

5. What's the most unusual thing on your desk that best defines you as a person?My damn cat-a-day calendar, bitches!
This morning my boss left me a cheesy trophy she picked up in the LA Airport last night, with an Oscar lookin' fellow that looks like he's trying to expose his chest--the base reads "World's Greatest Manager." Don't ask.

I also have a bottle of Tabasco with no cap and a half-eaten chocolate chip cookie.

Suck on that!
two bottles of water. my purse brimming with little notebooks, pills, gum and sunglasses. a lamp, a box that used to have a sweatshirt in it, but i took the sweatshirt home, my messenger bag with my company logo on it (that EVERYONE at work carries even though we look like losers when we show up places all carrying the same bag--but hey, it's a sweet Timbuktu laptop bag that cost a pretty penny and im too cheap to buy something else anyway.) a book called "Hey Whipple, squeeze this! - A guide to creating great ads" that i thought would help when i get stuck but doesnt...a bunch of boring binders full of marketing jargon about video games, a stapler, a stopwatch for timing radio spots that i write, and a jar off white asparagus that someone put on my desk when i started work as an ice breaker. I bet i won't ever throw it away till we move offices (which is like next month)
The closest paper to me...the third line said "Type closure recommendation for Shawnnika and do risk assessment for Shawnnika"

No, my best friend is not named Shawnnika, it is a client.

I have a picture of Max, Juno, and Paul along with this awesome comic taped to my phone that shows these psycho parents with even more crazy kids in the background yelling "What do you mean we can't have the kids back?" that Paul got me!

Lots of dust too!
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