Friday, January 28, 2005

Friday Five...Taking a Little off the Top


Last weekend when Mike and I were in Chicago looking for 'partments, I saw the best name for a barbershop ever: "Surgeon of Fades." Hell yes, I want to get all faded up with the utmost skill and precision possible, not by some shaky old man. If I were a guy, I'd be in that place lickety split. That's the thing I kind of enjoyed about Chicago, all of these haircutting places had simple, to-the point names like "UNISEX." I can get underneath those scissors. When you live in southern Indiana, you mostly get all these frosty lipped, permed women running hair salons out of their carports all Steel Magnolia's Truvy style (only the places are filled with stale cigarette smoke, there's always a shady tanning bed in the back and the woman who runs the place is nowhere as cute or charming as dolly parton). I mean seriously, do you really want any of the overbleached, prom updoed ladies above getting her mits on your head? What really gets me is the awful, awful names these salons are given in the name of "creativity" and "origniality." If I had a dollar for every time I've seen one of the following hair salon names while I drive through Desolation, Indiana, I'd be able to buy each and every one of you your very own Topsy Tail to spruce up your next Glamour Shot.

Top 5 Cliched and Annoying Hair Salon Names:
5. Shear Perfection (or any other variation thereof, ie: Shear Magic, Shear Delight, Shear Wizard....these all actually exist in Bloomington)
4. A Cut Above
3. Cut N' Dried
2. Mane Street Salon
1. The Cutting Edge

Actually, I could go on: The Cut Hut, Tangles, The Hair Affair, Close Cuts,Be Hair Now.
Though these are all so bad I just want to run into the salons and stab out my eyes with some dull scissors (who really uses the word shears anyway), one of the worst has to be when letters are altered for the sake of alliteration, such as Kim's Kutting Korner. For more on that, see this funny page. I didn't include alliteration-based names because because this affliction is most commony found in the world of child care (Kiddie Kare....hurl!).

Comments:
Don't forget about the best name in bloomington, why Hair Jordan of course. Who said they were all unoriginal. Great post by the way
 
Ummm I just have to say that last night when Paul and I were driving home we saw a hair place called SHEAR ENVY!!! HA!!!
 
"I already get my hair cut at the Cuttin' Corral."
--Napolean Dynamite
 
I saw a new one when I was in Flagstaff this weekend:

"Hairitage"
 
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